Subscription Boxes Gifts

"I love boutique healthcare! I have a great doctor on retainer and I get this great subscription box every month!"

The Pill-of-the-Month Club!

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

'If content is king, why doesn't anybody want to pay for it.'

The Music Box

Wine of the Day Club

'We now have 28 subscription cards in every issue, but we MUST HAVE MORE!'

"What's the cheapest thing we can order and still get a box?"

"I'm sorry, your grapefruit subscription ran out and I forgot to renew it."

Subpoena-of-the-Month Club

Man with fake beard gets a package from the Beard of the Month club.

After our sun sheds the last of its energy and collapses in on itself... ...after the solar systems degraded, their planets flung out and consumed... And after those billions of stars in their billions of galaxies are all slowly snuffed out one by one... ...and after the last of the supermassive black holes evaporates... A single last question will remain, drifting through the long, cosmic dark... To renew your universe, please update your payment details.

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"I subscribed to a collector's magazine! It has great interviews with big-time collectors who buy the world's rarest treasures."

"I'm increasing your OnlyFan subscription..."

"When did Charlie switch to a subscription model?" "Sniff my butt"

"I'd like to buy your subscription list to check for changes of address."

"Now paid subscribers will have access to as much free content as non-subscribers."

Introvert-in-a-Box

"Did you join the testimony-of-the-month club?"

"I'm sure it was just an oversight, sir, but your subscription to 'Time' has lapsed."

"It's not exactly shopping. Many companies have my profile, they send me stuff they know I'll like and they bill me for it."

Our bank account is now behind a paywall...

"Glad you could join us, Donna. Please take a seat."

"You know very well what subscription forms."

Q & A's How to unsubscribe.

Nature abhors an empty box.

'Stop whining about commitment! I only asked you to go in on a magazine subscription.'

Larry hits a paywall while reading an eye exam chart.

"It's not exactly shopping. Many companies have my profile, the send me stuff they now I'll like, and they bill me for it."

"Hello, I'm calling to cancel my subscription to the Punch-of-the-Month basket."