Style Guru Humorist Gifts

Trinny and Suzanna.

CLOTHES-HORSES OF THE ART SCENE

Handbag store - "Perfect."

'We live in difficult times. These underwear don't help one bit.'

'She's so put together!'

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

The difference between cosmology and cosmetology.

A women in a shoeshop.

My Dad, trying to look young. The cap hides his bald spot and the sweatshirt hides his gut!

"Most of these pelts were suicides."

Keeping warm.

"The derby is better. That makes you look like Abraham Lincoln."

"Absolutely not!"

"Walking erect is very trendy now."

"I feel like we've walked into some sort of epidemic of hipatitus."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"You look great. One problem though: I'm the one who goes to work."

Mystery Solved - Boxers or Briefs, 'Thanks but you could have just told me.'

"They're not Levi Strauss - they're not Levi Tate."

"Diamonds are so three billion years ago..."

'Do you like my little black number?'

At the suit makers

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

'This is our bestselling power tie. Just put it on and clap twice.'

Mr Metrosexual.

"He's gonna be in and out for a while, so we should write something funny on his forehead."

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

"It's the only way I can justify buying so many shoes."

'Trust me, it's very proper to mix stripes.'

'Do you have anything a little longer in the leg ?'

"That shirt is so last year."

"Everybody should live in a market economy. It's terrific."

His and Her wardrobe's

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'She thinks it makes her look enigmatic.'