Strong Golfer Pillows

"You're way too strong Dad: You've overshot the green by about two hundred metres..."

'I'm not quitting! Who knows if i'll ever get another chance to break a hundred!'

'You both know the rules -- walk 1 paces, turn, and tee off on each other.'

Golf lessons

'I won't be coming to church any more, Reverend -- I've decided to convert to golf.'

'I don't care if you do need practice hitting out of the sand. The cat needs her litter box!'

The Amateur Golfer

'I love these senior citizen discounts.'

Dick's hobby of collecting manhole covers kept him out of trouble... except of the hernias.

Senior PGA Moment.

'The water hazard holds little fear for Jesus.'

"You couldn't just stop and ask directions, could you?"

'I wonder why my master never makes it into the Master's Tournament?'

'Don't move.'

The Uncle Vinnie Insomnia Open

Man in artic weather playing sport with snow balls

Clock Face Golf Set

Old man plays golf, supported by his caddy and paramedic.

Happy-Go-Lucky-Father-Of-Two-Avid-Golfer-Longtime-Magnetic-Tape-Salesman-Kiwanis-Member or Thomas Pynchon?

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

'Motion seconded!' (golfers)

"Duh!"

How You Know It's Spring...

"He,he!. . . Some guy on the ninth hole is going crazy looking for this!"

"A preliminary census report indicates that for the first time in our nation's history female anthropologists out-number male professional golfers."

'We're looking for missionaries to cover the golf courses and shopping malls.'

TOLD YOU TO TAKE LESSONS FROM GOLF PRO

Luckily I hit the pin!

Too many beers at lunch?

'Tell me the truth,Rodney - you've moved the hole haven't you!'

Slippery hand golfer

"No, Dad, I'm not practicing to be a golfer when I grow up! I'm practicing to be a doctor!"