Streaming Skeptics Gifts

'It's not a revenue problem, it's a spending problem.' - 'If it makes you that mad cancel your subscription to Netflix.'

"My granddaughter's first words to me were 'OK, Boomer.' I have no idea what that even means."

'Sure, a drawing on Facebook has coverage, but nothing wows the family like a spread on the fridge.'

Rare Books

Sci-Fi Museum. New Exhibit. H.G. Wells War of the Worlds. In 1938, Orson Welles broadcast "War of the Worlds," a radio drama about aliens from Mars invading earth. The radio drama was presented as a series of fake news reports about devastation caused by the invading aliens. Many listeners turned in to the program mid-roadcast and thought the news reports were real. Widespread panic ensued. Wow! Orson Welles caused all that panic with a radio program. Just imagine what he could have don

"Your MBA and PHD are impressive but what concerns me is your low number of Facebook friends."

Lies/Damned Lies/Social Media

"No one uses Facebook anymore. I'm on this new thing called make-believe."

'I'm old enough to remember when smiley faces were right side up.'

"No annual raises, but I will 'like' all your hard work on Facebook."

"Can't we have 'PRESS BUTTON' to shut up the commentator's gobbledegook."

'The doctors say I have a rare illness that turns people into birds - it's untweetable.'

"Reading social media, I almost miss grammar, spelling and punctuation"

'Enjoying a snifter of brandy by the fire...'

Down With Wikipedia

#notblessed

Facelook

'After analyzing 5 petabytes of Facebook data and 800 million tweets we were able to conclude that our customers are idiots.'

Look! This says that space aliens have landed and have taken over control of the earth. Boy that's a load off my mind!

"I had to hire younger employees to keep up with today's technology and social media."

"I'm suffering the unbearable loneliness of being right on the internet."

Psychology Clinic. Most potent example of solipsism I've ever seen --- he follows himself on Twitter.

"Still no offers - sometimes I think I'm the only one using this site."

"Sorry -- The doctor is out -- But we have like 10 influencers available."

Fake News

You can have your privacy back, as soon as I've finished showing it to everyone

We need references other than your 336 Facebook friends.

'I see your site doesn't have a 'like' button. The good news is it doesn't need one.'

'I see that you have two sisters and like the beatles, I predict that you will graduate in 2012,,,'

"Like Facebook, I have also changed our company name so that it will be more clear and transparent to our customers who we are and what we do."

"...as they may share in our joy.", "For we are all as one."

Nice Apology, Mark

"I must say, Doctor Jeckyll, that you bear little resemblance to your profile picture."

Curious George, Dad

But It's So Easy