Streaming Service Skeptic Gifts

Cable / Satellite / Digital TV "Still nothing on TV."

The Digital Dark Ages

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Would you sit and watch a 12 hour movie?"

Live Stream

"We cancelled Netfix for this?"

"I adore kids, but I also adore Netflix."

Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what is good on Netflix.

"You look pleased with yourself. What gives, little buddy?" "Well..." "...Netflix was removing their 'Voltron' reboot, so I spent forty hours straight streaming it. I finished all eight seasons with seconds to spare." "It was worth it. The show was so insanely good that it made me feel like I was ten years old again..." "...like I just skateboarded home with a Mountain Dew and a bag of Funyons after watching 'Footloose.'" "Something tells me my '80s were a lot sexier than your '80s."

"We can watch anything you want, as long as I don't have to keep my eyes open."

"Ed's not really into binge watching...he just can't find the remote."

"I wonder which will come first. Me finishing this binge worthy Netflix series or another Netflix rate hike."

"I love binge watching streamed content."

"That was good, but we could have watched it on my phone."

"Look, all we did was sleep together. I saved watching 'Game of Thrones' for us."

"It just doesn't crackle like the one on Netflix."

TV - Please stand buy. We've run out of ideas.

"I say leave them alone - better streaming than screaming."

"It's a weak pilot, but, if your stick with it, by Season 3 you grow completely numb to the show's quality and just keep hitting Next Episode."

"Do you want to watch another episode or heal our relationship?"

"This island may not have food or water, but it does have wiring for streaming services. Too bad we didn't put a TV in the life raft."

'Are you enjoying watching the telly off on demand?'

"This year has been a disaster. But, my breaking point was when Apple TV+ hijacked 'It's The Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown,' away from network television."

Watching TV.

"Someone's been sitting on my network and used it to pirate these movies!"

'A few years ago that wouldn't have even sounded like a sentence.'

Limbo services: 'what gives...this line hasn't moved for hours!'

"It's going to be my first protest song, as soon as I can figure out some words that rhyme with 'Napster,' 'Bertelsmann,' and 'service charge.'"

Happy STRANGER THINGS Day! (11/06)

"Sometimes, you will be asked to go days without Netflix."

"I just don't see a future for us Jane, our Netflix wish lists are just too different."

"How many times are you going to playback that last episode of 'Friends'?"

"Did you ever wonder who's really raising our kids?"

Apple TV+

Earth wearing Mickey Mouse hat