Strategic Swinging Gifts

'I knew we should have put the CEO's increased bonus item further down the agenda.'

"It only goes forwards and backwards. So, you won't need a GPS."

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

"This never happened."

Swinging

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

"I'm doing whatever I feel like doing, before I reach the age of accountability."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"Maths is easy because it's so logical. 2 + 2 obviously equals 22."

"Ok, so I go back and forth… Then what?"

Swing

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

And if the ball is completely unplayable...

"This is a fast-paced job you're applying for...what are your goals...where do you see yourself in the next 10 minutes?"

"Recess is over, Your Honor."

'Not without your helmet, you're not!'

'Where's my horse?'

A bride and a groom on a swing

"I don't want our date to end, either, but my arm is about to fall off."

Automatic swing machine

Thursday is the new Friday

Stone henge swing.

"If I had it all to do over again, I would have liked to be the King of Swing."

'I'd add 'UK' to your name and do it in big red letters...that'll be £15,000.'

"Ralph - you'd play better golf if you had your eyes checked."

'Let's give it a whirl. Swing is back!'

Cab Calloway Swings

Tom, you may not want to pause so long at the top of your swing.

"It must be still charging."

Headphone swing

"This is where I come to unwind."

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

Golfers lost on the road