Storytime Lovers Gifts

Humpty dumpty, the wall and the banana peel.

"Abuelo, can we read the one about social security reforms again?"

"We wouldn't have had to come here if Goldilocks hadn't stolen our porridge!"

"We learn an important lesson from all this - from curds and whey, and pease porridge, and bread and honey. Eat natural foods."

Big book of memes

'Couldn't Peter claim Mr. McGregor's garden was an 'attractive nuisance?'

"According to mom the answers are all in this book!" "Too bad there's no pictures at which to look!"

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

'First the dinosaurs, now this...'

Little Princess.

"No sweetie, it’s a beurk not a book."

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

Old Mother Goose Nursery Rhymes

"Oh,oh - here comes quality time again."

"Customers who bought 'The Three Little Pigs' also bought...."

Biggles has a more staid adventure.

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"Let's see. Seuss... Seuss... Here we go. That's a medium box of bagels and lox and a pop on the rocks by seven o' clock."

"Because he's illiterate. That's why I have to read to him all the time."

'Tell us the story of Moses again -- I like the chase scene!'

Hansel and Gretel Day School.

"Go figure: nobody wanted to kiss me when I was an ugly prince, but now, somehow, pretty girls are lining up!"

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

"Only one pailful? Did they have water restrictions like we do?"

"Mommy usually reads me a story, then slips me a twenty."

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

'I wonder how Curious George fits into all this?'

'Come on, girl! I know you can do it! Jump over the moon!'

"After I fix your laptop, can I have a bedtime story?"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

"Why did I start the story with 'Twice upon a time?' Because it's a sequel."

'Moses parted the water so the Isrealites could go across? You mean in the mud?'

'The cow jumped over the Moon? -- What was SHE on?'

'It doesn't say what she had for dessert on Thanksgiving. It just says she made a coach out of her pumpkin.'

"What you find 'boring' spies from all over the world would find extremely interesting."