Storytellers In Bars Gifts

'I told you. . . H not S!'

"...and the humans turned Neville into 80,000 toothpicks..."

Mom, there's a simple explanation for this...Aliens from outer space.

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

Pastries and Candy

'Are we there yet?'

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

'He was a great writer'

Jorge Luis Borges

Man takes picutre of other man holding up huge worm at Bait Shop.

Cat scratches on a pirate's wooden leg.

It started friendly enough...'I'm Henry VIII, my dear, but you may call me 'Hank'.'

"So you're just now tellin' me I was hatched from an egg and I coulda' left years ago?!?"

"Honestly, I thought you were a metaphor."

'Tell me about your gap year, Mr, Van Winkle,'

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

'It's okay sir, I'm private Johnson.'

Having moved to a tablet, the farmer's wife was done with mice. . .

''Rumplestiltskin' sounds like an ALIAS to me!'

'New hope for dysfunctional couples: Read aloud the complete works of Trollope.'

'Could you carve the Commandments in stone? -- otherwise they'll think I made them up.'

"That fish may be bigger, but I caught more."

"I don't like the way the new pastor is looking at his flock."

'He followed me home...Can I kiss him?'

Snail: 'Do you mean to tell me I'm not a credible author?!'

"He's been downgraded to a Category One."

Mouse Sidewalk Cafe

David and Goliath.

'They're not out of focus. They're just fuzzy memories.'

'Oh-oh -- I think I've invented writer's block!'

Book editor tells Jesus legal says he can't use title 'Greatest Story Ever Told'.

'What do you mean, I'm not your type?'