Storybook Park Goer Gifts

Birds reading over woman's shoulder.

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Late night teddy reading

Bookworm Sleepover

Papageno from The Magic Flute

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"My, grandma, what a big nose you have! Let's take a little off the sides."

Need a Qualified Adult for Pooh Sticks

The Shed Mystery: 'Ah! There you are! Ok, that's enough...time to go ho...uh...wait...what the...?'

"Where the wild things were."

Alice in Wonderland: The Queen Turns into a Pack of Cards.

"Ever since you changed from a frog to a Prince you seem a little jumpy!"

Beware of the crafty Kia bird of New Zealand.

Little Princess.

Old Lady in shoe driving a footie (sock) car.

'Put some feeling into it. I can't tell the difference between the lion and the mouse.'

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

"Damn! I'm in the wrong fairy tale. This is the three little pig's house, not the three bear's!"

The Optician At Home: "....And it didn't fit the other sister, either. Then Cinderella tried on the glasses, and she could see perfectly."

"The doctor will be with you two in a second. As for you, I'd recommend a motivational speaker."

Treasure Island Book.

"Do you have a good attorney or a bad attorney?"

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Cupid

Sleeping Beauty

"The third little pig is now a menopausal porker. I hate these hairs on my chinny chin chin."

'He said he won't give me a new heart unless I change my lifestyle.'

"Grandmother, what big diastolic numbers you have."

Many princes attempted to wake Sleeping Beauty, before one of them simply kissed her'

Alice in Wonderland: Alice and the Dodo.

Grimm's Fairytales - Title Page