Story Whisperer T-Shirts

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

"Keep your shirt on. I'll read your book as soon as I'm done reading the monster his book."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

A kangeroo and it's baby read books about understanding each other.

"I got those famous last words you wanted"

Children's education

''My Summer Vacation †the Untold Story'....'

Mother's Love

Get out of the way, Harold - I'm trying to talk to Cuddles.

I used to love coming here. Nudist beach.

Mother threatening to gag her baby.

"Dang, there goes another piece of the wife's good china. You see father, it's

'We'll have him back on his feet and under yours in no time!'

"Stop squawking. Use your words."

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Reading

Teacher getting the childrens attention by pretending to be on television.

"Hey, you guys, don't you remember? The big word here is 'compromise.' "

'Astronomy I, Astronomy II, Astronomy III'

"Tell the truth, Ezra. Does it look like he's being a more effective parent than me?"

"Now all we need is a good script."

'As far as we can tell, the system went down because someone stepped on a crack in the sidewalk.'

"Do we have to use our inside voices through clenched teeth like you, Ms. Baker?"

''Normal' seems too much to shoot for ... but maybe I can keep you out of the nuthouse.'

"The sellers recommended that I burn some sage during the tour."

"You'll be able to talk to your husband. I have video conferencing."

'...and where did you bury the bone?'

"I'm in here, rereading the great poets, myself among them."

Duplass Brothers

'I wish I came in a child-proof container.'

'U. . .S. .U. .C. .K. . . . L. . O. . L.'

"I'm the ghost of Christmas Tree Future, and honestly, it doesn't turn out well for you."

'I promise you we'll have him out of here real fast... we need the rest.'

'Sometimes patients become a little attached.'