Stone Oven Fanatic Gifts

"No, I can't just fire you up one of those stone oven pizzas."

You're the puff in my pastry!

"Damn - another letter to the editor."

"Make yourself comfortable on my new decorative throw rocks."

'Garfield has told the oil companies to go to hell.'

Local rock claims to have been muse for Emily Dickinson poem "I'm that 'little stone' honest to goodness!"

Early Business Planning

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'Hold everything! -- The National Endowment for the Arts changed its mind!'

Pre-Historic Gentleman's Duel

Early accounting scandals.

"And here is the very stone that finally enabled us to figure out what all those dogs and cats were saying."

"The arms reduction talks are off to a good start -so far, we've agreed to ban pebbles."

Used wheels

A Matryoshka dolls putting an oven in an oven

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

"I think I know what your problem is. Not enough PR."

"Too much club."

"My doctor says you should be drawing more fruits and vegetables."

"What if it's smarter than us?"

The first Dermatologist.

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

"I call it angle-poise"

"This must be Easter Island!"

"Apparently he needed an emergency hernia operation shortly afterwards!"

Unfinished Masterpiece.

Caveman and prostitute drinking at bar talking about the world's oldest profession - hitting a guy in the head with a rock.

'Is the fire included?'

'I invented the wheel, and to protect it, I invented the club.'

'Try to become less emotional, Mr Stone!'

'If you worked on inventing fire instead of that round thing, you wouldn't have to eat cold cuts.'

"I'm collecting everyday objects for a time capsule."

'- and this is the drawing room..'

The first art critic

'He also wants to be domesticated.'