Stern Visage Expert Gifts

A Hard Look At Hard Looks

Tweet! Tweet! Tweet! Ok, team it's a tie. We're going into overtime. First score wins the game! Let's see your fiercest game faces! That's it! My sudden death panel!

'Before we get started, let's go around the table and practice making eye contact.'

"Double vision! Are you sure?"

"They call me the king of railroad salvage - 'they' being my wife, actually."

"Your problem isn't the prescription."

"The STEM program has many advantages: you can invent stuff, you can use great equipment...but let's talk about the great cafeteria food."

National Optometrists Association. O.K., whose idea was it to form a focus group?…

'I'd say your vision is being affected by an arrow through your head, but perhaps you'd like to get a second opinion from an eye specialist.'

“He runs the top Virtual Reality company in the world. In fact, that’s not really him.”

"Your main problem is that instead of a set of complex organs composed of specialized sensory cells and sophisticated nerve structures, you've got two pieces of coal."

Optician: 'I can't seem to switch off.'

Bird watching in Bolivia

"After practicing dermatology every day, maybe you should try branching out from those warts-and-all biographies."

"You know that theory....that we're all part of a giant computer program?..."

Dr. BR Smith Optician.

"Well, Mr. Swanson, I don't know that I can help you improve your standing in your focus group, but I can definitely check out your visual focus."

'I wonder if they KNOW about each other?'

Plastic Surgeon Kid

"Since you're a lawyer, it will be a bar exam."

Don't worry Sir, being colour-blind is not much of a problem around here...

'You are on a sickie you skiving little...'

"No really, I'm a toad too! I found a great dermatologist who treated my warts..."

"I started plucking my eyebrows, and I couldn't stop..."

The Seeing-Eye Squirrel

Eye clinic

"You have tiny websites burned onto your retinas!"

"I was at a party and got some avocado dip in my eye..."

"I wish you'd have made your appointment a little sooner."

"Long time no see."

Virtual reality platform.

'After a close examination I think I know why Tabatha keeps wandering onto busy roads.'

Fly Eye Chart

'I'm looking as young as 20 years ago? Honey, promise me not to see an eye specialist for the next 20 years!'

Guide dog reading paper over a man's shoulder.