Stereotype Smirker Gifts

Thank you for putting up with the driver's ranting.

Birthday Cakes: From Around the World

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

'I took a couple of years off after college to work on my smirk.'

'When my business turned into a lemon, I made lemonade....but that also failed when nobody liked its taste'

"No, Mr. Kurlander, I don't have, nor have I ever had, a recipe for cranberry muffins."

California Beverages Map

Latest Aye Phone

"I can't hold it together much longer. . . If Bradley doesn't wipe that smug, self-satisfied smirk off his face soon, I swear I'll kill him."

'He touched you and you can walk again? I just got an illegible prescription.'

A Donut Ride Outside of a Police Station

"Well, well, looks like we got ourselves a coupla city types here, and a couple more city types right behind 'em, and a whole mess o' city types transferrin' to the Queens-bound F train."

Alpine Pipe

"So that's Ireland."

'How did you know his name was Fritz?'...

"All I know is that one of them was raised by wolves, and the other was raised by geeks."

'Say, how can I convert this FAT file into a nice and small JPG?'

"I'd like to have myself declared legally blonde."

'Dave... Your intimate apparel is showing.'

"It's from my Swiss account."

Lady to man about big hole in wall: 'Show some gumption. Are you a man ... or are you a mouse?!'

'Why do people always assume I download my music illegally?'

7 Reasons You Might Be Irish. . .

City travel agency: 'Send me somewhere with women who appriciate a real man!'

'Alright, son, we'll give you an apprenticeship. You seem to have what it takes.'

'Call yourself a pirate? Where's the parrot and peg leg?'

American Toddlers vs British Toddlers

'Can Johnny come out?'

"Did we tell you? Debbie's going to be on 'Car Talk.'"

"The smile is courtesy of Photoshop."

Notice. I no longer respond to an questions regarding kilts! Thank you.

'Bloody typical.'

Customs at the L.A. Airport

"I wanted somewhere like England, but in Spain!"

'These little green pills should help you get your Irish up.'