Stay-at-home Comedians Pillows

Working from home

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

Politicians' basements (as seen on TV)

'Fancy us all being afraid of wasps when there's a WHOLE nest of 'em in my drinks cabinet!'

"I'm learning to live with existence."

"You think two weeks in isolation is hard?"

'That's the problem with living with an artist, the fruitbowl is always off...'

"Nice touch." - Resume playing music.

"What do I do - I'm a mouse pilot, like everybody else."

"If I'd known you were not looking for experience I wouldn't have lied on my CV."

"Galileo, I've had about enough of all your gravity experiments!"

'Look at it this way ... one bad job can can give you all the experience you'll ever need.'

'The best gig I can get you for your comeback, Lazarus, is DJ in the graveyard slot.'

"Your former employer said you demonstrated a remarkable amount of 'get up and go'...especially when you were fired."

Happy Brithday

'I didn't hear you calling. I can't listen to everybody who yells at me.'

"I see the cat's left us another little offering."

Where do you see yourself in five years? 35.

'It's a new record, mom - there are six of us in here!'

"I #*#*#* hate gardening, I'd much rather be at work!!"

"Right kids, there's no camp and no vacation, but Mommy and I are super excited to make this summer our best ever!"

Please Wait Here To Be Scolded

"Your accomplishments speak for themselves. Unfortunately for you, I'm completely fluent in exaggeration."

"And that was my day at the office. Thanks, Alice, you've been a great audience!"

'This wouldn't have happened if you'd played catch with me more.'

". . . And after the latest coronavirus update, we have the following cancellations - life as we know it!"

"Last night we watched three movies back to back. I was the one facing the telly."

"And I suppose my greatest feature is that I don't mind kissing a little booty to get ahead!"

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis."

'According to my Dad, bosses are just like headmasters. The only difference is that they give you money every month.'

'Tell me about yourself. If I stay awake, you've got the job.'

'I DO NOT pamper the dog - Now get out of his chair!'

Snowman in the Freezer.

Stay at Home Yellowstone.

Snake pulls prank posing for photo