Station Managers Gifts

Metropolitan Prize Puzzles.

Health and safety notice falling on builder.

'Henry has found his niche with us.'

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

Hourglass Dumptruck

"That's why safety boots are so important. . . you see? Eddie's feet have stayed perfectly dry."

'Ooops. Wonder if I can claim El Nino caused a surge in water pressure?'

The Modern Beaver Dam.

"Something's trying to get through the Astroturf!"

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

'I understand he has a hard boiled management style.'

"Politicians can't make the trains run on time but they never miss the gravy train."

Man takes sandwiches left beneath a 'please take one' sign

Acme Petroleum, since 1925 and 9/10.

Builders.

Dominoes

'After sinking all our money into our website, we couldn't afford to finish our building.'

'Since our stadium was built with taxpayer support, I regret to inform you that all incentive and signing bonuses must be returned.'

'Don't worry about the condition of the pitch, I've got my best goat working on it.'

"It needs a dash of gravel, I reckon."

'Best bit of winter pipe lagging I've seen for ages...unfortunately, that's just the scaffolding.'

'Bob, I was just trying to get you on the phone to see what all that noise outside was about.'

"Well, the drought is over."

"So we're agreed then - there's no need to make any changes to our equal opportunities employment policies."

"Lucky you were wearing your hard-hat!"

Father Christmas.

TV scheduler's garbage in and garbage out baskets..

Work Accidents

Gas Station: Unexplainable Price Increases

'Staff management is pretty easy. If you've got a vacant job, give it to the employee of your choice. After that you place a job advertisement.'

Covid Masks

'We deeply regret to have to inform you that no train will be late today. You even have the chance to get a clean seat. Please accept our apologies. Thank you for your understanding.'

'There will be no editorial from our Station Manager tonight, because he's still in jail from his last editorial.'

"You remind me very much of myself when I was your age, Carter, and there is no way that this company would employ such a person."

'Go ahead and dig, you said! what are the odds there's a pipe right there, you said!'