Starting Basketball Training Gifts

"The big bucks are in pro sports. So instead of doing your homework, get out there and shoot some hoops!"

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

Church for sports worshipers.

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"They’re baseballs. You throw ’em."

"We first met on the net. We began to court, but between my foul mouth and Wilson being on the rebound...let's just say it was a long shot, but he pressed, and I was defenseless. Now, we're as 'hoopy' as can be."

"College basketball recruiters are after him."

Gary turns 40.

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

"We can't Sunday. We've been invited to 'you know who's' skybox."

The Salmon Run

"How should we divide the teams?"

'Pass it to Dewey! He's got himself into some kind of rhythm!!'

The Popularity of Pickleball Inspires a New Wave of Hybrid Sports.

'Wow! That's some growth spurt!'

'There's more to life than winning. There's also losing - to offset taxable capital gains.'

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

'Wait!... I don't want to take Brady out right now. He's just getting into rhythm.'

Brad discovers what can happen when you don't wash your gym clothes...

'Let's go over our secret play.'

"I'm less a role model than a cautionary tale."

Before getting a basketball scholarship, Jack worked at a pancake house.

Kick Me! (sign on an anthropomorphized soccer ball)

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

The bovine who jumped over the news went on to a great career w/ the Bulls!

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

Why moms make bad refs.

'Verheyen! How many times have I told you? Don't let your personal life affect your play on the court.'

'Anything is possible in our great country, son. If an Afro-American can become president, a white man can become a pro basketball player.'

'I don't mind players entering the NBA at an early age. It's the diaper changes that I hate.'

Playing pig

'It's a combination of March Madness,,, and Linsanity,'

'And now, please stand and join us as complete amateur butchers our national anthem.'