Starting A Weight Loss Journey Gifts

'Yes,your feet are still there!'

Overweight Man With Skipping Rope - To Be Taken 3 Times A Day.

Diet books are in the wide aisle

On her doctor's order, Wanda watches how she eats.

'Let's try this -- I want you to drink a gallon of water before every meal.'

Woman using balloons to try and lighten her weight.

"I'm suing my scales manufacturer for slander!"

"Good For You / Bad For You"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

Be Healthy

On the back of the t-shirt...

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

Always empty your fridge before starting a diet.

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

'If you exercise you add 10 years to your life.' - 'But I would spend the 10 years exercising.'

'You need to stay away from the pie in the sky.'

Begin this high fiber diet slowly. Too fast and your co-workers may complain of a greenhouse effect.

'What'll it cost me to got in shape for yardwork season?'

Exercise now!

Garlic Free Zone.

See, eating healthy isn't so bad...."

'Take one of these diet pills every time you regain consciousness.'

'I won't tell my thighs if you don't..'

"Welcome to Sugar Free Farm! The reality show, where celebs go cold turkey on their sugar addictions for two weeks."

"Would you like me to give it to you straight or sugar-coated?"

Exercise Bars

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

'Is your cabbage diet working darling?'

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

'Please, could you me to Polish my diet!'

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"