Stand-up Comedy Explorer T-Shirts

Stand-up Romcom

Iran bars two UN nuclear inspectors for 'untruthful reporting'

"Get off the stage and get a copy of 'Studies of Laughter in Interaction'—I think you'll enjoy it."

"I now what you've come to expect from me is physical comedy, but tonight I thought we'd try something a little different."

"I like my steak well done."

Stand Up Bush

"We don't like the same marriage counselor gags anymore."

Religious toilets.

Chicken comedians.

STRIP "Looks like the escalators on the blink again"

Stand-up comedy while you're away at work. 'What's the deal with fetching? ...And they expect you to run and go get it, so why did they throw it in the first place?' 'Ha! Ha! It's funny because it's true!'

'Time ou! ... Flea!'

"It's just a wild guess but I suspect that the 14 points apply done at six countries may have contributed to your feeling a 'bit unwell'."

"Day 1: Back in the carrier."

"I just attained enlightenment! - Gimme a high-five!"

Dry Blood Humor

Quick Sand and Slow Sand

'He arrested two kids yesterday. One for drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. He charged one and let the other off!'

'Have you done any stand-up?'

Hijinks of the Colonial Era

"Oh, sure, Mr. Nice Guy robot, bringing in the pastries...we get fat and you just sit there, charging your batteries!"

"What did the plankton say to the whale? I can't believe you're baleen on me!...Get it? Baleen?....Whoa! Tough crowd."

'I gave the Captain a thousand bucks to strand us on an uninhabited island with nothing but a musket.'

"I showed Tia Carmen these really funny cartoons I drew...but she didn't laugh."

'He put himself through med school doing stand-up.'

"What have I told you about shoplifting, son!"

'What a beautiful landscape!'

'Poor Oog -- evolution sure has AGED him!'

"Oh, look - a Halloweiner dog!"