Stage Show Buff Pillows

'Marlon the magician freshens up before the performance'

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

Showbiz Awards

Department of Theatre, Film and Television: Lights...Camera...Unemployment!

Backfire

'One eye of newt or two?'

Trump! The Musical

"They've remained remarkably faithful to the text."

Saint George and the Drag Queen

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

"Bloody hell!"

For speedy operation and ease of control get a pony.

Deflator mouse

Mikado

Senta jumps into the sea

Mikado

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

A little bird told me...

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

Romeo & Juliet & Ron

"It's basically the 'Tragedy of King Lear' but with animated penguins."

"Is there a vegan option?"

"Britain's Got Talent is now in its tenth astonishingly brilliant year!"

Cossack dancers

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

'Yes... but is he a good watch dog?'

Your tiny hand is frozen...

"Beware of the frog"

'Sorry, but I'm arresting you for being in possession of an endangered wild coho salmon.'

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

A man walks his dog wearing a cone.

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Cat Hecklers