Stage Curator Gifts

The Cycle of Life.

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

Paul Klee

'They all want to play the star.'

'Fine stencilling. But have you never thought - Tit Willow, Tit Willow, Tit Willow?'

"I think he was a celebrity."

"I'm beginning to regret taking this job at the local playgroup."

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

Modern Major General

Painting taking root...

It's a call from Tate modern.

"Can you speak up: there's a bloody racket going on in the background."

Mr. Empirical With "Antarctica""Small is hostile. Rage contributes to shift away from literality. I'm off to True Value Hardware for some more self-reference tools."

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

The Kitchen area of a Whitechapel Boarding House

Schools of Art - A Rough Guide.

'Projectile painting.'

'I could do that.'

Couple Sitting in Front of A Sunset.

'No, Timmy, we are not supposed to connect them.'

Stephen Fry

Acme. Breakable prop transporter.

Rodin's Browser

Woman crying with happiness.

"I was going to call it 'Empty Plinth', but then I settled on 'Winter's Smile'...I wanted to capture the 'nothingness' of an 'absence of anything'..."

Children's Art Show.

"Now this I get."

'Number two. That's the art that offended me.'

'From an aesthetic perspective, it has heart, beauty and intrigue, but is it a viable process design?'

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

Escher exhibition first floor

"Good artists borrow, great artists steal."

M.C. Escher Exhibit Upstairs.