Stadium Architect Gifts

'Of course, that's just a 'ballpark' figure for the cost of building a new stadium.'

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

'Couldn't you just bring a bucket and spade like other children?'

Building Sandcastles.

Young Picasso at the Beach

"You can build it with me, but you can't wreck it with me."

'They're being damn noisy in the hospitality box next door,'

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

Swing

"Before we begin. . . terms and conditions. . ."

Goodbye Opiate of the Masses

"He lives in a block of flats"

Football Game Tickets. These seats are so far from the field we'll need a passport to get to them!

Constructing your own prison!

"I hope we can flip it before the tide comes in."

'Do you do anything with the old casks?'

"Well, since his retirement from British Aerospace the only thing he's managed to do is build a bird table

Fan-Centric Stadium

"As far as form following function, it's a brilliant design for a business center."

Switchback Playground.

twist building

'Since our stadium was built with taxpayer support, I regret to inform you that all incentive and signing bonuses must be returned.'

"There are 45,000 people at the stadium but only 500 of them bought tickets...the other ones are security guards for our 250 million euro player!"

I told you you weren't allowed to stretch before the seventh inning. Security.

Salvador Dali - Memorial Park

"The garden is my résumé."

With the Inflatable Pocket Potty, you'll never have to wait in line again at the stadium.

"Lawsuits must really be getting out of hand."

'These things always taste better at the ballpark.'

'I hired a local guide. He knows every square inch of this stadium...'

"There. Six bedrooms, all with en suite, two lounges, parking for four cars and in a great location. How are you going?"

'No, it's not the Rapture - The kids next door got a trampoline.'

'If you have a toothache, take the day off, you would be useless at work anyway...'

'Show off!'

A child builds a really long wall along a beach.