Sporty Humor Lover Gifts

'On your Marks...'

I think it's time to retire from boxing. I'm too old for life in the fist lane.

"Well, that may not be the farthest drive I've ever seen...but t sure is the highest!"

'Are you sure you didn't improve your lie?'

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Golfer to other: 'I've never seen anyone slice a putt before.'

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

Cat and mouse.

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

The best goalie in the world!

'...and watch out for his 'flipper'!'

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

Pole Vault Rules

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'He's a bit confused after that last round.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

Team medic spraying deodorant

'That was a peach of a right hander the referee gave you!'

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

"Wow! This really is a lofted iron!"

Foam finger gets stuck up a foam nose.

"I'm sorry I called you boring."

Dominique Valera - The King/Cat

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor