Sportsman Gifts

"Oh, it always starts politely."

Rugby player searches on line for 'front teeth'.

Men shooting both claim the same bird

Mr Briggs's pleasures of shooting - No. X

Bernard Hinault

'Cricket Hits - By Dumb-Crambo, off his own bat.'

Ted's Brilliant Rugby Career Was Plagued By Nagging Injuries,

Skeets Champion.

'Heulluva Mark.'

'Great fireworks! Reminds me of the coach after we lost the game!'

'I admit to taking steroids to enhance my endorsements.

'Did Fred Perry win at Wimbledon?'

'I Marianne, promise to see all of your games in sickness or in health, for richer or poorer until death do I watch.'

'We do not tee off in front of the markers.' - 'This is my second stroke.'

'Get up,you fool-you're the one who's on the canvas!'

I love hockey!

'Naw, I ain't athletic - it's just eye - hand coordination and the heft to hit the long ball.'

Need to celebrate? we will pour ice water on you, only $27.50!

'He's been gone a good five minutes.'

"All you gotta do for a million bucks, big guy, is show up on weekends and run down the field with this ball."

Bill Shankland

'Albert Figgis gets board backing.'

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

'Let's not fight.'

'You got a good offer to endorse a new painkiller.'

"We're going to have to work on the letting go bit."

Nick Pope

Cricket

"My new boyfriend is a golfer. . .he's very good with his putter!"

"Just reach under his belly and lift him into the boat."

"Welcome to your new club, my friend! Of course we will help you to find a car, an apartment and a tattoo shop."

Performance Enhancing Drugs

'Is it time for spring training already?'

'Yes, Mr. Osborne, this is an intervention. Your family had no other choice. Golf is an illness...'

-I think I've caught a cold -It's the only thing you've caught all day!