Sports Wordplay Lover Gifts

Teacher to student: 'Ah - your hockey report! Did you cross-check your references?'

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Staff support"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

Boneheads! I never said I was bringing ten condiments!

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

Wolf Danny With "Random""The work must be tantamount to mayhem. Making an insatiable public confused, indifferent, annoyed—this is the premise on which rests my deliberately vacuous oeuvre."

"Has anyone seen the dog?"

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

Punt Cake

Please Drove Carefully.

Lesser known greek gods,

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Wok. Don't Wok.

Vlad the Inhaler

Gay Times...

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

'I've been called some mean things as a baby boomer, but 'Pig in the Python' really hurts.'

"Out damn Spot

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"The best part is that we got hell to pay for it."

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

The Alpha Seltzer