Wordplay Enthusiast Gifts

'No, I said 'paralegals'.'

"I made partner!"

"And remember, if you need anything I'm available 24/6."

"Hold on -- your boarding pass says 'possum,' but your passport says 'opossum.'"

"Are you telling me that just because something is against the law, that makes it illegal?"

"My contractor told me Rome would only take a day."

"No, it's not a typo."

"First off, you're not a nut. You're a legume."

Caution: Fork in road ahead.

Department of Silly Sounding Prescription Medications

'Avez-vous French toast?'

'Okay, so I don't know how to spell it, but just tell your pharmacist it's the drug with the really long name starting with 'r'!'

"It's just a fact of life that sometimes bad things happen to good cigars."

"Get all the second opinions you want, doctor, …. You'll still be a quart low."

"You may approach the bench."

Mortally Wounded at the Battle of Quebec, General James Wolfe Forgets His Last Words

"Ok, now randomly alternate vowels and consonants and we got a name for our new drug."

"...and our new drugs - Palistilap, Orfinifro and Kyriltliryk - are all palindromes."

Out of tuna

'You don't call this a legal document, do you? I can understand every word of it.'

'In hindsight, I believe that our oversight was shortsighted...'

Semantics - A classroom in which meanings are discussed (Actually, this is just a door. The classroom is on the other side of the door.)

Great coaching is about actively listening...

'I knew it! 'Chicken' comes first!'

We can't call it restructuring,we did that in '98 and'97...

'What did you put down for the definition of plagiarism?'

Books/How to get to the point/Volume 1

"Can you have another look at this? There's still a few sentences people might understand..."

Herbal/Verbal Remedies: "Snap out of it."

'Copy and study this list of text message spelling words. We will have test tomorrow.'

Mergers or acquisitions.

'Your uncle left everything to Charity... So far we haven't been able to locate her.'

"No, but I can tell you the meaning of whole or term life insurance."

"I'm in securities." "I'm in insecurities."

'You must assert yourself more.'