Sports Teammate Gifts

'Don't panic! Remain perfectly still. Do not make eye contact. If he attacks, curl into a fetal position and play dead.'

"Staff support"

"I've always dreamed of being on an academic team like this! It's great that we can all depend on each other!"

"Shall we start with an icebreaker?"

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

Welcome to the Team

'Hey, look, I can stand up and shout, too!'

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

"Now, let's get out there and walk really fast to places we don't want to be."

"I bet you're curious about what's going on in the R&D Department."

'Will you lot come out! - the new kit's not that bad!'

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

"How should we divide the teams?"

A married couple share the same pole vault.

The best PE teacher in the World.

Win - win

HR - Helping Relationships

'Why are you arguing? The customer is always right, you know! 'But he called you a crook!'

"Yo, Ned Beatty, paddle harder if you ever want to kiss me again."

The Other Cooperstown

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

'I'm wrapping it tightly to keep the ankle from swelling.'

"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to far, go together." - African proverb.

'He's been hiding out here for 20 years. Apparently, his buddies forgot to tell him the paintball tournament was over.'

Speed of assimilation VS New team members

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

'I like to greet the new team members myself.'