Sports Rebel Gifts

Chess bowling.

'Man, that new guy is nothing but a thug!'

LIV golf

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

"Slow down. I need another drink. Can we rest for a minute?"

"I can do whatever I want. It's a free country. Well, at least for the time being."

100k Desert Crawl

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

A souped up car...

'I hate PowerPoint.'

"Sure, my dad and my granddad and my granddad's dad were all domesticated. But that doesn't mean I have to be."

Rugby Player

Summer Sledding

Men's Department. I want a tie that says, "I hate ties."

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

"It's improv night."

"I don't get this. I know that you're a computer hacker and must have done many bad things. But your record is completely clean!"

"Better get a move on, only 1,314,000 steps till Christmas."

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

"I am worthy of human kindness and care. I am worthy of human love and respect. I am worthy of huma rights and equality....or death to the f**king lot of 'em."

'No, I haven't taken up jogging...A velociprator was after me!'

The over 80s ain't what they used to be!

'I ran the mile in two minutes. I took a short cut.'

Enraged by Wikileaks reports of CIA domestic surveillance via home electronics, Della Dinkerbonker fights back.

'So... cutting my funding, eh? Well, I've got a pair of mutant fists that say otherwise!'

Play golf on the billiards table.

Replaced by a millennial with artificial intelligence.

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Skeets Champion.

We've looked at this data from every angle.I guess it's time for someone to actually read it.

"Sigurd advocates civil disobedience relating to the 'law of gravity'."

Michael Schumacher