Sports Rebel Pillows

Chess bowling.

'Man, that new guy is nothing but a thug!'

LIV golf

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

"Just one more thump. . . just one more thump."

"I put the speed on reckless. . ."

"I can do whatever I want. It's a free country. Well, at least for the time being."

"Slow down. I need another drink. Can we rest for a minute?"

100k Desert Crawl

'We're almost 1/8th of the way there.'

A souped up car...

'Would you mind terribly taking up some other sport besides long-distance running?'

'I hate PowerPoint.'

Summer Sledding

"Yoga has helped me appreciate the healing power of donuts."

"Sure, my dad and my granddad and my granddad's dad were all domesticated. But that doesn't mean I have to be."

Rugby Player

"It's improv night."

"I don't get this. I know that you're a computer hacker and must have done many bad things. But your record is completely clean!"

"I didn't miss my workout...I didn't miss it one bit!"

The over 80s ain't what they used to be!

'No, I haven't taken up jogging...A velociprator was after me!'

'So... cutting my funding, eh? Well, I've got a pair of mutant fists that say otherwise!'

Enraged by Wikileaks reports of CIA domestic surveillance via home electronics, Della Dinkerbonker fights back.

'I ran the mile in two minutes. I took a short cut.'

Play golf on the billiards table.

Replaced by a millennial with artificial intelligence.

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

Skeets Champion.

Fireman chasing the olympic flame.

"Sigurd advocates civil disobedience relating to the 'law of gravity'."

Scientists chained to the floor

"Lab animals the world over will be grateful for what you're about to do."

We've looked at this data from every angle.I guess it's time for someone to actually read it.