Sports Merchandising Gifts

"We're adding to the 'home' and 'away' shirt ranges with our new 'alternate Tuesdays in March' option!"

Womens' bras come in football cup sizes.

'My long-range goal is to turn pro and lead the league in product endorsements.'

Sportswasher's

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

Sports Sponsorship "What do you mean he lost?"

'Slugger' Sims...Leader in: Home Runs, RBIs, Endorsement Deals.

Athletes today strive to build their own brand. That receiver needs to catch that pass and have a catchphrase.

Replica Football Merchandise

"He'll do anything to get his underwear sponsors a mention!"

'So how did Hakeem take it when you told him we'd be paying him in footwear instead of cash this year, for being our spokesman?'

'Bad news. Your arm is too injured to hold up those sneakers you endorse on TV.'

'My fan focus groups indicate that I should show more of my legs.'

'My husband wants to know if the sonogram can tell if the baby is a Red Sox or Yankees fan.'

"I decided to go on land after I got the sneaker deal."

I need a ten-letter word for a collector of inexpensive sports memorabilia. A "baublehead."

"It's how I get someone's attention."

Only used once

'Now that's what I call merchandising!'

"I'm going to try to settle you down, Halberson, but first a word about Fexler Lite Beer."

The Sponsored Skier

Football players with The Frilly Knicker Shop on their shirts, "I wish we could change our sponsor"

Welcome to Stupidity Night, Pay Full Price and Get In Free.

'The champ will make twenty million from this fight, mainly from selling advertising space on his shorts...'

"This is the new pre-season, post game, after lunch but before 4 PM kit!"

New England kit arriving today - "What time's rip-off ?"

'There's more to life than winning. There's also getting schools to pay you a share of their ticket and sports memorabilia sales.'

I bought a pair of running shoes, and haven't seen them since.

Designer Shoe Dwellers

Sponsered rugby players

"And that's why I avoid moisture-wicking sportswear."

'If you guys take it easy on me I'll let you be in my next T.V. commercial.'

Forged signed memorabilia.

Ladies in Lycra

Help! Made the Olympic trials but couldn't get a product endorsement contract.