Sports Coverage Guru Pillows

'The sports seasons never end, now with all his fantasy leagues.'

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

Sport: Crisis in the Real Madrid.

'Me? Dislocated thumb from switching channels to catch all the Olympic events. . .'

Maybe we should stop calling it 'The Masters.'

Gold Medal for IOC boss Thomas Bach in the discipline of Brown-Nosing-Dictators-For-Money.

'That was a flagrant misconduct of the left hand.'

'Call 911! He watched 12 straight hours of football without training adequately.'

'What the... Oh, lucky me - it's just something easy to get rid of!'

'You reckon we should mosey this guy?'

Red State Football

Armchair quarterback/Armchair everything

Mudville

Hair Style Menu

'I don't want to mention any names, but one of you isn't giving 100% out there.'

Football Fan.

Doping

'We're sending you down, Hartnett. You need to work on your scratching and spitting.'

'You may be wondering what a sex scandal has to do with managing the national team...'

"Would you guys shut up and let me watch the game?"

'I'm proud of the lads. They show'd a lot of character coming back from one down. . . then two or three silly goals. . . At this level you get punished. But overall I thought we were a bit unlucky. . .'

Winter Olympics

"If you don't wish to hear the match result look away now."

"Your fastball is just hanging and your curve isn't breaking at all. What you should do is take an analgesic with some pain-relieving anti-inflammatory ingredients for a few days."

'The new Hawkeye proves a hit with most of the crowd at Wimbledon.'

80 Million Euros for a football player.

'Just remember at the Olympics the finish line has become the bottom line.'

"Just remember, if you give a hundred and ten per cent, I get twenty per cent of that."

'Touch me and I'll see you in Strasbourg.'

Tough day coach. What happened?...I think it's pretty obvious Frank...You can't win a ball game with that many turnovers!

"May the best team win and could we please get through this game without some kind of controversy?"

'The selectors must be meeting...'

'I think the guy in the black trunks is going to take a dive.' (he has Titanic tattoo on his chest).

"This part of the match was fixed...errr....sponsered by..."

Novak Djokovic