Sports Complainer Pillows

"What do you mean it's all sport, sport, sport? You love the adverts."

"They want to put up a new cell tower in our neighbourhood?! We don't need more of those radio emission eyesores here! I'm gonna complain... ...as soon as I have better signal strength."

'Almost everything I have hurts and what doesn't hurt doesn't work!'

Man from refuse department says: 'We'll send you a new wheelie bin, Mrs Trubshaw, there's really no need to 'orchestrate a mass Twitter campaign'.'

#notblessed

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

"I finally have an ailment that isn't so bad that I'm worried, but bad enough for me to complain about constantly"

"These guys stink. They're the worst team I've ever seen! What a bunch of losers!"

Welcome to Yosemite, Hell on Earth!

'I thought I'd seen everything, and then my wife came up with tofu fajitas.'

"We only shop brick and mortar because my husband likes to be disgruntled face-to-face when returning things."

"I don't like it already."

"True, the fly is not in my soup. But it took one taste of my soup and dropped dead."

"One more remark like that, lady, and you'll never get to see this show."

Input (not yours) and Output (only mine).

'Sure I had the world on a string, sittin' on a rainbow, but my finger turned blue and my hemorrhoids were killing me!'

"Where does it hurt?"

"He's told them many a time, not to let defenders shoot, but do they take any notice. . ?"

"'C-minus'? -- I'd like to speak to your supervisor!"

"Want to bitch for one more lap?"

'Touch me and I'll see you in Strasbourg.'

'What are you annoyed about now?'

'I hope you find something that's worth complaining to my friends about.'

"You will NOT kneel during the national anthem!! And look me in the eye when I'm talking to you!!"

'Hi, I'm from Complainers Anonymous. Can I see the manager?'

"Don't worry about me. I can be unhappy just about anywhere."

Complaint Department worker. 'Gosh, I'm good at this job!'

'You know, this work is misery, but I really like the people I work with.'

Complaints and Gratitude.

'I'm afraid your complaining is chronic.' - 'I want a second opinion!!'

'The alarm didn't go off, my car wouldn't start, missed the bus, my back's aching, haven't had a raise in two years ...'

'I'm just going to our front gate for a chunner!'

Mowing Job Sucks.

"Do you mind? That’s really annoying."

"Too sunny for you. Too dry. Whatever next?"