Sports Comedy Lovers Gifts

The locker room door suddenly swings open, and Randy is busted by a steroid-sniffing dog.

"Sweetie, I know we missed Princesses on Ice, but I'm going to make it up to you."

The game requires no great physical strength...

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

'Why couldn't you throw like that in the game?'

'Best save I've ever seen.'

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

"Fancy dyeing your hair white so everyone could see it was you who played a shocker!"

The best goalie in the world!

Pole Vault Rules

I just trained with my two sparring partners over there. A "boxed set"!

Ok, ok, maybe you guys are right - maybe I do have a concussion.

'We've conducted a chemical analysis of the beef in hot dogs, and we've determined, Mr Ruth, you are guilty of steroid enhancement.'

'Captain, we're going to have to ask you to stop spiking the ball.'

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

The Cricketer and the Golfer

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

Golfers forming the raising the flag on Iwo Jima.

'Focus! Focus! You've just gotta' forget about their home ground advantage.

Pole jumper about to land on a giant whoopi cushion.

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

Captain Ahab and Moby Dick in Retirement

"Listen, I've had 25 fights and won all but 24 of them."

'...And Timmy, as usual, will guard goal.'

Golf escape.

'In this...um...part of the circle...'

"Twenty seven shots, first hole. I think we'll call that a dodo."

The Puck Stops Here.

'Please open your mouth and say '68, 56, 87, ..'

Discus accidents.

Foam finger gets stuck up a foam nose.

'Relax, teamwork always leads to a slam dunk.'

Jack Nicholas - Sun-Visor