Sports Bracket Filler Gifts

'That, and my head is shaped like one.'

How to Deal With Leftover Turkey

"Next time you score show a little respect and don't spike uncle Frank so hard."

'I hate it when they emulate their major league heroes.'

Basketball Tourney. Ernie, you're crushing everybody in the office basketball pool! You've picked the winner of every game so far! It's amazing because you don't know a thing about basketball. For you, picking the winner of every tournament game is like correctly guessing a coin flip sixty seven times in a row! No, I have a system! It seems everybody has an opinion about the tourney so I listened to what my investment advisor thought about the teams. And with his record of picking winners

'This may be an old computer, but it won the March Madness office pool again and wants the money deposited in its Swiss bank account.'

"Where would we BE without the right DOCUMENTATION...?"

'Golfers rowing a viking longboat.'

Rugby Mad.

"Since he retired, he hasn't quite figured out what to do with himself!"

'I don't see how you can put your profession as TV star just because you were in the crowd of Match of the Day!'

'Don't be afraid!...Bobo's just going to fix the teeth a little tighter.'

"This should be good! I switched his discus with a frisbee!"

"I have bad knees."

'Open wide.' 'Your wallet.'

"The lines are a bit slow today...so here's something to help pass the time!"

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

Handbags at dawn. A typical bout of fisticuffs on the rugby pitch.

'Sorry boss, I've decided to live dangerously and become a shelf filler.'

"The doctor says you have an acute case of march Madness. Here's your bill."

"Simplified application form? This IS the simplified application form..."

'When pastors take sports analogies too far...'

Sorry, coach. My mom says the other football pants are "too revealing."

"Don't even bother – we missed the deadline to finish our March Madness brackets again."

IRS Auditing, 10 loopholes or less.

'I bet I can tell you the score before the game starts. Nil-nil.'

"Want to play a little game of "Guess Their Tax Bracket?'"

"Too bad you don't put as much work on our financial planning as you do on college basketball brackets."

For Timely Filing

'New rules. You must declare last year's refund as income this year.'

'You want an extension? In the middle of the war on terrorism!'

'Stay back! He's threatening to jump!'

Clancy: Meeting with the Bank Manager

'Well, the internal swing mechanism is shot. I can fix it, but it won't be cheap. If I were you, I'd just go back to the dugout and choose another bat.'

"...Then that's a two-disgruntled taxpayer family."