Sports Aesthetician Pillows

Hurdles with Steps

'Wrinkles can't breathe in mud.'

'Excuse me Ma'am, do you mind if I smoke?'

'This facial cream is called 'High Definition'...it brings out beauty in sharp, wonderful detail.'

'Botox...'

"I can Botox it, but I don’t want to freeze up my sixth chakra."

'And if it ain't baroque, don't fix it.'

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

Level up your game with a MANicure.

"Apricot pit?! Are you kidding, Mister? This stuff knocks raw avocado and almond nut outta the water!!!"

Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Sebum! I think you'll love this property on the left side of the chin. It's a wonderful place to start a pimple."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

Tragedy and Remedy.

'I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I had the whitest teeth!'

Headpiece to E Dowson's 'The Pierrot of the Minute'

"Do you have something cheap but with a really expensive label?"

"Ugh. When will this acne go away?"

'A neighbour of mine has just come in - put 'em in a size 4 box, will you?'

'Sometimes I wonder how things would have turned out, if I'd gotten Mom's eyes and Dad's hair.'

"Apparently, the golf clothes and expensive golf clubs didn't help you play better."

'This must be the work clothes section.'

"Mr. Potatohead had second thoughts about having a facial peel."

Brazilian Squirrels

Flower growing out of a face mask

"Cool... You got a Brazilian Wax."

'Anything else you want fixing, while I'm taking the mole off your nose?'

'It wasn't strictly cosmetic. The cheek implants help me store nuts.'

Knickers, little peaked caps, gaily striped socks - it's all so chic!

Nail Gun Manicure

Bloomer Wax: 4 Pence

'Trouble is, I only want to wear them for cycling to work.'

'My friend here would like to try the Brazilian.'

The circular nature of running wear.

"I don't really follow sports. I just like how it looks."