Sports Beauty Enthusiast Pillows

Tennis Cosmetic Surgery.

'I'll make my final decision on that promotion of yours, after this game.'

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Another expectant father looking forward to paternity leave.'

'Look around, son. See if there's one you like. But remember: These are abandoned players, unwanted by their teams - so they might come with some psychological baggage.'

Bad hair day!

'I'm not abandoned. I'm a free agent.'

"Lautrec or Gary? Hmmm... We'll take Gary."

Football Chameleon

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

If nobody had invented graphics

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

"Lordy, I am such a klutz!"

"I always forget what an expert I am in curling."

A day at the transgenic races

"You'll have to help out here more. I pulled a hammy jumping over the moon."

Race track - with the race being to apply the white lines between lanes

Bobby's pitching coach told him to put some stank on the ball.

A married couple share the same pole vault.

Dating is so expensive...

'We need you to get onto those high balls coming over'

Pampered and poodled.

"How should we divide the teams?"

Ratminton

"Let's get ready to bumble!"

Saving a Heart

'Yes! The momentum's going to shift now. Our home fan is starting to make some noise!'

Gary turns 40.