Sporting Accident Enthusiasts Gifts

'Wow. A hole in one.'

I like the Jets...I guess

Xena: Warrior Princess, TV star, professional volleyball player.

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

"It's World Cup Soccer, Tia Carmen. The U.S. vs England."

Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'Sitting Up'

Noah's life jacket demonstration

In addition to brilliant grades and perfect SATs � Parents' night. College admissions. Your child should excel at 3 sports and lead a school extra-curricular like the newspaper. Don't the arts count? Sure! If your child sings, for example � A part on 'Glee' or in the Metropolitan Opera would certainly help. Our kids are doomed.

"The crash-test rating on this puppy is off the charts!"

"Yes! I hit a triple. Woo-hoo."

So far the coaching exchange program was hitting a few snags.

'We have to forfeit, Three of our players got squashed on the way over here,'

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

A Crash-test Dummy child about to have a ride on a car crash test ride in a shopping centre mall.

'To talk to men at their own level you have to talk a load of balls.'

'What makes you think we'll lose today?'

The Dangers of National Safety Week.

Get back in that locker room! Go on - scat! ... Anyone else forget to wash his hands?'

'He refused to climb the ladder without a safety net.'

Soccer games took on a whole new meaning for the parents of Hillsdale Youth Soccer.

David and Goliath.

'Okay, men, let's go out and win one for the flipper.'

The hall of bad ideas.

'I don't even care about the score, catty. I just enjoy the long walk.'

The Rugby Throw Up.

Psychiatrist to man dressed in baseball jersey: 'You've never gotten over the fact your father wouldn't play catch with you?'

'The blond guy is a forward and the other guy is a wing.'

'Glen Hoddle employs faith healer' "Remember the days we only had a magic sponge?"

NFL linebackers are identified in early infancy and sent away to the secret academy until puberty.

Rusk Assessment Form

"I can't shake the feeling there's always someone looking over my shoulder."

"I'm here to gets the gold"

"Don't hit him too hard, his little old mum's at the ringside!"

"I love this comedy. What's it called?"

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'