Spooky Tech Geeks Gifts

'I just love this new ring tone.'

Elfie Stick

'...then Johannes Gutenberg built the first bookcase'

"Recalculating route..."

Man runs into Bigfoot taking a selfie.

Selfie Stick

"There appears to be a flaw in our cloaking technology."

'If I wasn't meant to destroy the world, God wouldn't have created me with atomic blasters instead of hands.'

Evolving Changes in Medical Lingo

Highlights From The Annual Central Park Country Fair

"In the spirit of co-operation, peace and friendship with the people of Earth, we welcome Captain Zork and his incredible advanced weapons technology..."

An alternative theory as to why dinosaurs are extinct.

'Okay I admit it - we probably do need a rocket scientist.'

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

Giggle.

"I have no feelings about having no feelings."

A robot is in hospital, he has a card saying 'get welded soon.'

"I am using my GPS, but I spilled coffee on it which is why I'm really lost."

"Here's the remote to your smart home. It's big, but the good news is you'll never lose it."

The guy who took a wrong turn off the electronic superhighway and wound up in a microwave oven in Davenport, Iowa.

The new US Embassy in London is conceived as a solar collector, with pillow like panels of high-tech plastic and photovoltaic cells....and emegency vertical takeoff capability,

Space Tours. Ernie, in this interview promoting your space tours, you didn't acknowledge the first test rocket was vaporized in a huge launch pad explosion. I said "The first test yielded spectacular results!" There's nothing about your lack of a system to provide oxygen for the travelers. I informed people "the experience will leave you breathless!" Lots of your technology is straight out of the 19th century! I said "Come be a pioneer!" It seems most of your company's effort went into th

"Frank, how many times do I have to tell you, it's a posse, not a search engine."

Professor Biggens instantly regretted putting his head into the particle accelerator...

Actually, could you just e-mail me your electronic signature? Meet the author.

Caveman Wheel Invention Version 2.0

'My dad just invented the wheel!'

Thomas Edison's brother Wilmer...couldn't even figure out how to turn on the light.

"If God had intended us to fly in jets, He would have seen to it that the Wright Brothers invented jets."

Workplace Confidentiality.

"So how exactly am I supposed to give a self-driving car a ticket?"

'Sorry, Professor Kleinzweck -- your 'Chaos Theory' program just crashed.'

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Traffic Offence Selfie

Mars Rover