Spooky Stories Fan Gifts

'Sorry, nothing really scares us anymore since that time we accidentally walked in on our parents...'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"No, a chiropractor won't help. My wife just stuck another needle in the voodoo doll."

Love at First Sight

'One eye of newt or two?'

Night of the Latkes

Out To Lurch

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

Chiller Theatre

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

Silence of the Chickens...

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

"What are you kids going to be for Halloween?"

Ghost puddle

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

Pull my finger! Zombie Humor.

Halloween Support Group

"For drinks or dinner?"

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

How was the Halloween party? Who was there? It was fun, except the Zombie didn't talk to anybody. The Grim Reaper was a real killjoy, and the jack-o-lantern made a fool of himself -- by the end of the evening he was smashed. Did the Black Cat or the Ghost attend? I crossed paths with a black cat but I don't know if the Ghost came to the party. All night it felt like he was right there but I never actually saw him!

Ghost frightens the photo booth.

"I lose more girlfriends that way."

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

'There's an imposter among us!'

It's spooky how Amazon can track you down

'I told you that 2 month old balonie was cursed!'

Happy Halloween. Something's different about her. It's boo!-tox. Every Halloween its the same thing. They take candy off the house and never come to the door. That careless jerk almost trampled me! What was it? The "Heedless" Horseman! I know it's just toilet paper, but as a mummy it still gives me the creeps!

'Watch out for a very angry witch with a scythe.'

Witches at a cauldron.

Looky... It's Bat'minton... I'll see myself out."