Spooky Story Fanatic Gifts

Wife reads 'Hannibal' before going to bed and says "I heard something" to annoyed husband

"Do any of these eyes look like the ones spying on you behind an old mansion painting?"

Love at First Sight

Night of the Latkes

Out To Lurch

Chiller Theatre

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Zombies.

"If you insist on doing all the voices, Dad. Don't you think father bear should have a deeper voice than Goldilocks?"

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

"What are you kids going to be for Halloween?"

Ghost puddle

Halloween Support Group

How was the Halloween party? Who was there? It was fun, except the Zombie didn't talk to anybody. The Grim Reaper was a real killjoy, and the jack-o-lantern made a fool of himself -- by the end of the evening he was smashed. Did the Black Cat or the Ghost attend? I crossed paths with a black cat but I don't know if the Ghost came to the party. All night it felt like he was right there but I never actually saw him!

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

'There's an imposter among us!'

"For drinks or dinner?"

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'

"I lose more girlfriends that way."

Ghost frightens the photo booth.

It's spooky how Amazon can track you down

One of Dracula's 'coffin mournings'.

Witches at a cauldron.

'Watch out for a very angry witch with a scythe.'

Happy Halloween. Something's different about her. It's boo!-tox. Every Halloween its the same thing. They take candy off the house and never come to the door. That careless jerk almost trampled me! What was it? The "Heedless" Horseman! I know it's just toilet paper, but as a mummy it still gives me the creeps!

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

"Please....wait...the...meeting...host...will....let you...in....soon."

'Never accept the first offer, always hold out for more.'

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

Young Stephen King