Spooky Socializer Gifts

"I'll have a Bloody Mary. And bring a Witch Hazel and tonic for the little woman."

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

"Practicing my hate-face."

Beer Garden Kit

The Devil's advocaat.

"That's what I love about the game - it's so social."

"I gotta log off, guys - I just encountered some malicious spyware."

'It's okay guys! Come on in,the coaster's clear!'

"I’ve only been able to find movies, music, and restaurants that I kind of like using apps, but I’m hoping they’ll lead me to the love of my life."

"You ruin every virtual party we go to!"

"Oh, no thank you. I’m rumaki-free."

Will Make You Sick So You Can Go Home.

"Wait a minute. Isn't tonight the water conservation rally?"

'Your drink, madam. Courtesy of the gentlemen at the bar.'

"It can never work out between us. You're selfie, Instagram, and twitter shy."

"Of all the lazy, lowdown, deadbeat, pathetic losers you've ever met who had the most influence on you?"

'Well I'd love to stay and chat, but this is one of those 'get things done' days.'

"You're a plumber, I'm a doctor. Now that I've given you some free medical advice, how about stepping into my kitchen and fixing my leaky faucet?"

'They all work from home now, but still get together for carpool reunions.'

"I've learned not to listen to critics who are right about me."

"Can you turn your video on, Ralph?"

Military Hospital.

"Maybe we should change the name of the parish to something cool, like the Protestants do and add a coffee bar."

Cats Zoom

'I'm sorry darling. I'm not very good company tonight.'

'For a laugh I decided to have a potato chip tattooed on my arm - but the thing about potato chips, you can never stop at just one!'

"The other thing I love about drinking is that you can't do it online."

"Stop me if you heard me say 'stop me if you've heard me say this before.'"

"Why is this night different from all the other nights?"

"Come play doubles with us, Danny."

Guests Bring a Bomb to Dinner

"That one is for going AWOL but coming right back."

'Rodney doesn't mingle so much as rotates!'