Spiritual Warrior Pillows

Competitive Meditation.

Minister Starts at a New Church

St Louis and his Army Pray (The History of the Crusades).

'God, grant me all that I deserve. Amen'

'Mrs. Zegenzahn, I'm an expert on exorcising demons, devils and poltergeists, but insurance representatives? There's no remedy for that.'

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

Man practising karate is tempted by a glass of beer.

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

"Do you have an appointment?"

Monk Prompt

Woman looking into a mirror

"He was furiously reading the Bible before he died." "Looking for loopholes."

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

"Show off."

Nun Binning the Devil

"I'm not only a Guardian Angel, I'm also an expert at turnarounds."

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

'What I've learnt sitting on this mountain, alone for ten years, is how boring sitting alone on a mountain for ten years is!'

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."