Spiritual Voyageur Gifts

It took the members of the seance almost 2 hours to make contact with Muriel but it was worth it."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

"... and I have a follow-up question regarding rawhide."

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"

'He who laughs last probably doesn't get it.'

"Oh, great - They changed the Meaning of Life again."

"Home depot."

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

After 39 years, 11 months, 28 days, Moses finally received the GPS he ordered from Amazon.

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

'I think I just had an epiphany. How do I make it go away?'

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

"Wait, am I hear for you or are you here for me?"

"Some mid-life crisis that turned out to be."

"Honey, I’ve found God!"

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

"Tell her she's dead. I don't want to talk about the relationship."

Jesus's First and Less-Heralded Miracle Walk,

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

'No, really, go ahead. You know me - I'm all about the journey, not the food pellet!'

"You say I can move mountains? Right now,it's all I can do to turn over a new leaf!"

'Don't be embarrassed ? when I first attained Nirvana, I wet my pants, too.'

'You must heal yourself.'

Christian and Born again Christian...

Madame Lucille - Fortune Teller 'I predict the future'.

"Look, if I had all the answers, would I be living alone on the top of a mountain?"

'Eve wants a second opinion about the apples.'