Spiritual Traveler Gifts

Commuting bishop uses crook to hold on to tube train strap.

"You will grow richer and richer. Then one day you'll discover money can't buy happiness - and you'll give it all away."

Torah reading on the subway.

Welcome to Heaven! Please Leave Your Phone Here. . .

Services 2 Miles: 10 am - communion, 12:00 - Midday Service, 4 pm - Benediction and 7 pm - Evensong.

"I expected the mission field to be a little more modern."

Confessions on a plane.

'I've led an exemplary life! - when will you let me in?'

Reverend Quinby visits the holdy land

"This ashram looks good. Every night after dinner they have a stand-up guru."

"See you later Lazarus."

"Avoid hungry bears."

Let Go and Let God

"Buy low, sell high, but money is rarely a substitute for happiness."

Bible as the reading material on a plane

Guru Greg's Soul Repair

"How did you hear about us?"

Saint Christopher

9 items or less at the gates of heaven

"Rock and Roll Heaven"

'Oh, he's pretty wise -- I clerked for him.'

'To get to the other side, my son.'

'And mind where you step, we let dogs in.'

'He attained Nirvana in two weeks? - he's GOTTA be using steroids!'

'Somewhere with good karma.'

REINCARNATION DESK, 'There's a pretty long waiting list for Episcopalians, but I can get you into a Hindu right away.'

In Case of Emergency

"I'm referring you to a specialist."

"The key is to make them laugh."

"Obviously, the toilet paper should go over the roll."

"The meaning of life? To be honest, I haven't given it much thought."

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

'It's a nice idea. A bit rough around the edges but I'm sure it will evolve given time.'

'I hate to be so skeptical, but I still think the seance business is a hoax!'

"Ooh, ooh, I know this koan! I got it! Pick me! Pick me!"