Spiritual Speedster Gifts

"Jesus! Do you have any idea how fast you were going?"

"It was bad enough learning to master the use of wings here but roller-blades must have been a nightmare!"

Radar Gun Readings at Baseball Stadium

Golfing Bishop.

At the 2021 Religious Games

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

"I want to be straight with you, Cathy—I've gone through a number of cars in my life."

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

'Hey, wait for me!'

'Never, Ever...drive 56 mph on a 55 mph freeway in a sporty red convertible.'

Car leaving highway crashes through 'EXIT HERE' sign.

Birthday Racing Car

'We're all getting older ok!' 'These days I'm down to the speed of sound!'

Man running

"Sorry, eighty is not the new sixty-five."

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

"IBS isn't all bad. It was largely responsible for me winning 6 sprinting medals in college track."

"Emergency exits are located on both sides of the cabin...."

A souped up car...

"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."

Om and Ommer

'I've got a confession to make dear, I'm The Stig!

Driver at Grand Prix shooting another driver with the cork from champagne

"I'll bet you were good at making skid marks?"

Fast Lane. cars Like yours.

"They're perfect astronauts. Fast velocity followed by a long, slow pace."

'Hey! I just started my James Patterson novel and I'm on chapter 97!' 'You read 20 pages already?'

Rolling Stop.

'Now close your eyes and visualize our upcoming softball game against the elm street zen center and kicking their sorry behinds.'

"I did it Dad! I ran all the way home and beat the rain!"

Priest's computer screen reads: 'e-confession. Please type 10 Hail Marys ... and no cut'n'paste ...'

Congratulations for male runner

Arcarde Patrol

"He's a super-calloused fragile mystic, hexed by halitosis."

"Before I start today's sermon let's take 5 minutes to view the highlights reel from the last 3 Sundays..."