Spiritual Scoreboarder Pillows

Man on death bed, hand in clouds through window like umpires, 'The final out'

"Break his third chakra!" "Knock the dharma out of him!"

'Hey! Contemplate your own navel!'

Golfing Bishop.

"I never dreamed we'd migrate."

"I'm TRYING to extinguish my ego, but I feel so CONSPICUOUS up here!"

The First Annual Game Show Week.

At the 2021 Religious Games

'Truth is fine, but I really need marketable ideas.'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"You're kidding! You count S.A.T.s?"

"Do you have an appointment?"

'And with this one I scored 138 not out...every one off the edge.'

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"Wow, Jesus. That lesson rocked, someone should write this stuff down."

"Show off."

Community church - the home of religion lite - Sermon: 'Atheism? You may be right!'

'What I've learnt sitting on this mountain, alone for ten years, is how boring sitting alone on a mountain for ten years is!'

Pessimists v Optimists.

'Enlightenment-shmenlightenment - what I'm worried about is tenure!'

'No, I didn't get a presidential pardon, but I got something better. God has forgiven me.'

"I cried because I had no shoes, till I met a man who had athlete's foot."

'Come off it-she only said the guys will be fighting over us because you said we lived UNDER a boxing club!'

"The meaning of life, eh? Beats me... Let's google it."

"Oh, it's you, I'm glad I picked up.You wouldn't believe how many annoying telepathicmarketing calls I get."

'If you can't control your temper,sister,you shouldn't be playing this game!'

'I understand the Adirondacks are where it's REALLY happening.'

Sport, Political, Religious and New Yorker Cartoonist Gurus.

'Hope it's legit. I never had the chance to say good riddance.'

"The good news is, I got religion!"

Sammi and her 'partner' decide to have their child baptized at a Suuuuper-inclusive church

"The meaning of life at a glance"

'Peace on...peace on...good heavens! Where are we?!'

'Let's have some fun - Let's order from that place that guarantees pizza delivery in thirty minutes!'