Scoreboard Strategist Pillows

Pessimists v Optimists.

The First Annual Game Show Week.

'This is looking less and less like leg cramps and more and more like a career-ending injury.'

The MBA Draft

Old navy veteran 3rd base coach

Sweep the board.

"I don't understand it! My nerd detector's going crazy!"

"To be clear, I said I want your 'A' game, not your 'Eh?' game."

Perils of the double play.

"... It's just that, when you said you had a couple of tickets to see the big game..."

"Ok, Ok! The ball wasn't out!"

'Unbelievable, these guys brought a ringer.'

"Now, suppose some guy comes at you balanced between two blocks."

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

The Other Cooperstown

'I'd better make a note of your blood group...'

'At least we don't have to accomplish anything in order to go to a bowl game.'

"I love fast break business success."

'...You push the wrong button, and now, instead of our fans enjoying a fireworks display, we've got an international incident on our hands.'

"You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!"

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

"If you think it's tough at this level, kid, wait until you get into calculus."

"My computer beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick-boxing!"

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

"But if we win and the Visigoths lose then we're the wild card."

"Fellas, I invited Max here to give us a fresh, millennial take on how to get out of the inning."

'You are dreaming the impossible team.'

"They play union in heaven... where do they play football?"

"The good news is I used AI to fill in my March tournament bracket and I won the whole thing. The bad news is AI has become self aware and wants the prize money."

'Every team needs a role player. And your role on this team, Bill, is to sit at that desk and crunch numbers.'

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

Baseball Clubhouse Pranks

"Before we start, does anyone fancy a bet on the outcome?"

'Are you blind ref?'

'Here's a play my backup QB designed. Everyone goes long and I throw to our opponent.'