Spiritual Follower Pillows

"Neither Confucius nor Lao-Tse nor Buddha can help you. You either have a knack for chopsticks, or you don't ."

"I'm afraid I can't green-light anything - you'll just have to pray."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

Monk Prompt

Drive-thru Church

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'

"Tomorrow will be mainly sunny, but with some scattered showers..."

Jesus is Scourged (The Holy Bible).

"Amen. Thanks everyone, oh and don't forget to subscribe!"

'This business about the meek inheriting the Earth -- can't anything be done about it?'

'I keep thinking I'm David Icke...'

Pastor puts up sign on pole stating that he is 'serving' his 1,000th sermon.

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

Spiritual Lives Matter

'It's Sundays like this that I regret our church website is so popular.'

"God may have forgiven you, but Hoskins, Danner & Smythe, LLC, have not."

'...and we used to grumble about not understanding archaic church language!'

The evangelist turned lawyer's opening arguments were unconvincing

"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."

"The buck really stops with him."

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

"Attendance is down again this morning. If we want to continue calling ourselves a congregation, we're going to have to congregate."

"Nice sermon. Not too preachy."

'It's just a phase they're going through.'

"But how many followers do you have?"

Pope Francis

Decisions a Pope makes

Our busy Sundays are Christmas, Easter and hurricane season.

'My husband does everything religiously except going to church.'

Pope John Paul II 1920-2005.

Lost santa and reindeer.

How to go through life attentively with Marshimallo Yogi

'We're going to start this week's sermon with a review of the basics....'