Spendthrift Society Gifts

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

Second hand furniture.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

'It seems to work, I couldn't afford a blackberry!'

So I'm "cheap." It's a perfectly good word. And it aptly describes my interest in conserving resources. I suppose we could call you "thrifty." Heavens no! And waste two whole letters? I see we've only wasted one whole tea bag.

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

Queen of Upcycling!

Thrift: New way to eat eggs (avoid needless transport costs).

'We are entering an era of thrift, so in place of champagne and canapes, there will be a jumble sale.'

That's supposed to say garage sale!

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

"When I was young my parents couldn't afford to give me too much, too soon."

"I just..."

"I love these old decorations!"

"There's more inside."

'How effective is this new weight-loss regime?' 'We can guarantee you'll lose £50 at your signing on.'

Limerick On A Grecian Urn

"I need something that says, 'Let's party,' but in a fiscally responsible manner."

Vintage Dresses: Your Frock Exchange

Crap others threw out

"Enough with the garage sales, Harold."

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'It's time for the annual wage review...' (Sign on the wall says 'Remember money isn't everything!')

"I think I found the perfect time of year to sell my old clothes!"

"What do you mean 'upgrade' the server? The old one works just fine."

'It took a six hour operation to remove this fiver from your fist.'

House sale.

"Well, one good thing about summer...is I work more hours and make a lot more money. The bad thing is...I have a lot more free time to spend it all."

Electricity Bills

Garage Sale (sign originally read 'Garbage' sale).

"My doctor told me to get outdoors more, so now I put on more yard sales."