Speed Reader Survivor Gifts

Wife: 'So how was your Speed-Reading class honey?!' a man who couldn't handle the pace of a Speed Reading class enters his flatapartment injuried with a trail of pages behind him on the ground

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,

"Yep, I've read this chapter before."

"Barb's such a fast reader."

'E-books?'

'It's very fast-paced. The book was over before I could finish reading it.'

'Well done Hopkins - I hear you cleared your in tray for the first time in twenty years.'

'It's a slow trap.'

"No you are not ok! Tell me what's wrong! You've been sitting for two minutes without checking your phone!"

'The only New Year's resolution he's still got intact is not to watch the England cricket team in Australia on television.'

'That was quick!'

Tripled his reading speed with no loss in comprehension.

'Just a minute, officer. I found a loophole in this law book!'

"He's new here."

Desert Island Books

"200,000 other people have also highlighted this passage of the E-book, you common idiot."

"And now Survivor Six...walking through your kid's room barefoot in the dark..."

Graduate

My name is Bob and my laptop crashed! Tech Support Groups.

Man completely bandaged leaves an eye uncovered so he can read.

Rapid reading center.

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

"Just give me the broad strokes."

"You been here long?"

"The secret to speed reading is skipping every other page."

Terms and Conditions

'Hey,Fred- I can hear the sea!'

"I'm entering the school talent show!"

A man reading whilst running on the word LIBRARY

Waiting and waiting and waiting room

'Go girl!'

"The 10-week course costs $600 and takes an hour and a half to complete."

Mindfulness meditation vs. Mindfulness scrolling.

"No, your book didn't 'lock up' on you. You actually have to turn the page."

"It's called a 'bookmark.' It's like a 'save progress' option."