Speed Eater T-Shirts

Overzealous health inspectors.

'I can eat a full lunch in five minutes and it takes you half an hour. That's why I'm the master teacher.'

Eat 'n' Pay 'n' Get Out Restaurant

"OK, now the chef suggests you eat faster."

Fast food restaurant: fast service and eating.

'It's great grub, but he throws you out if you eat too slowly.'

"My favourite food? Frankly, I don't really know. I eat so quickly I hardly taste anything..."

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"I need to tinkle."

"Hey Lady this is a sixty zone!"

Ancient Racing

The rocket powered skiier

Under pressure.

"Ten Dollars?! I can't eat that." Bob was on a strict low-cost diet.

'You must be fast, agile and unflappable! Having fun just got serious ponies....welcome to gymkhana!

A day at the transgenic races

'What was that?!' 'A 'Mach'-ing bird.'

"I don't know about you, but I'm ready to take this marriage full-throttle."

'You don't have a license and registration, do you?'

Bob's Driving School.

Wow. Totaled. Teen Test Dummy.

The Slug Replaces the Cheetah as the Fastest Animal on Earth.

Middle-aged guy spots an available convertible. The mating ritual begins.

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"If you think I ride too fast, Susan...just say so!"

'Top of the line sport shoes: They've improved my top speed by 0.5 kmh...'

'Now will you pull over and ask for directions?'

"WOW...this new bike has great acceleration!"

Route 666

'If mum's not around, amber means...pedal to the metal, baby!'

'My new browser is so fast I have to take motion sickness pills.'

'It says it works so fast, it's accumulated seven thousand years of vacation with pay.'

'God's speed.'

Living with Ulrich, such an adrenaline high.

'Geoffrey's kit car can go from nought to upside down in under nine seconds.'